Good morning guys,
do you remember your school days and mostly your vacation time? We always were a bunch of girls chatting, laughing and talking about the next big party and cute boys. Always in a cluster and it was fine. We attended the same courses, went to the same cafés and stores and also walked together on the way to the train station to catch our train/bus. But then life comes in your way and after graduation people spread all over the country/area. Interests change. Work comes along. Working hours differ. Relationships come along. It is hard to catch up with everyone so the few who are staying – the inner circle – are the ones who are worth the work.
Yes friendship is work. And the less you have to do the more you can invest your time in your friends. So go back to the time you where having about 10 girlfriends. Of course you knew what everyone was up to. If she had a new boyfriend, new clothes, which destination she went for vacation with her parents, who was heartbroken, who got good grades or the education she was dreaming of…
The list goes on and on. And of course you where able to know cause besides the time you studied or did your homework you always stuck together.
So “after growing up” it gets a lot harder to maintain those. And this is not only my side. I believe everyone is thinking this way. It is when being selfish suddenly becomes development.
After moving to another city and having a partner and building a house and working and having kids to care for there is only a short time frame left of your day and imagine how tiny it would be if you had to call 10 of your girlfriends to update each. So many get lost one the way. Probably some you thought you would stick forever (I had two really close girlfriends while in secondary school and now I don´t even know where they are or what they are doing).
So having two or three or even just one really good girlfriend you can call no matter what, you can always rely on, you can tell everything without getting judged upfront or being unsure what you can say to not hurt a feeling. To have as much fun topics as serious ones. That is enough and worth the work. Although you really should put effort and work into a friendship, it shouldn´t feel like actual work.
What do you guys about this topic? Anyone experienced something similar.